Shove It
by Kali Rhian
Summary: It's a law of nature boys...and being natural is fun! sr slash


**Shove it**

Remus Lupin felt miserable.

His nose itched, an incomparable denouncement of un-pleasantries, as he felt liquid threaten to fall from his nose. His throat throbbed each time he swallowed and his eyes insisted on swelling and growing into an annoying reddish color.

Not to mention the growing agitation of having one stare in your face for an unprecedented amount of time.

"Sirius," Remus called with determined eyes.

"Hold on! I'm attempting to read your mind-" He sat closer, his knees brushing against Remus's, although he didn't seem to notice. Remus, however, did in fact notice, and did not like the way Padfoot's eyes had a look of ferocious hunger, trying to burrow themselves inside of his very mind. It unnerved him greatly.

"Bugger off!" He shoved Sirius quite hard, and he toppled over the sofa, a disgruntled noise signaling his discontent.

The common room door swung open and James stepped coolly inside, surveying the wreckage with amusement. He grabbed a chocolate frog and plopped down where Sirius _had _been occupying. "Time of the month again, eh Remus?"

"No," Remus sounded like an indignant child, petulant and all with the snot that clogged his nose and made his voice stuffy, "just," a wild sneeze almost shot him up in the air, jerking his body violently, "allergies." He sounded miserable.

"I knew it!" Sirius's excited voice came from the floor, refusing to move from the spot of which he was pushed. He put his arms on the sofa and pulled his torso up, giving Remus a severe look, "Your mind just screamed 'SICK! HELP ME I'M SICK!' right before you so ungratefully pushed me." He made a mock sniff in the air, making his appear more like a sad puppy.

"Do abandon McGonagall imitations; they are quite unbecoming of you." Remus crossed his legs and looked up. Hiding a groan of displeasure, he buried his face into his book and carefully turned the page, hunched shoulders awaiting the reaction.

A flash of red stood out in the opposite side of the common room, Lily in all her fiery glory, and James shot up as strait as a dart.

"Guys," his eyes were strained and his voice sounded parch, "Look! Just walking, never noticing-"

He uncrossed his legs, a determined look on his face. Honestly, Remus was becoming fed up, "Just talk to her James, just go and, I don't know, say something! You're driving us all insane!"

He looked as if Remus's voice seemed far off, "Right." Like a machine, he stood up, his mouth moving but only a few sounds coming out. "Right, I'll just go and-"

Remus smiled, "Right, go and get her, tiger." James disappeared falling behind her, a small, hidden grin playing on her face as she saw him run clumsily to meet her.

Sirius just rolled his eyes. "Have I mentioned how glad I am that I have never been reduced to such a pathetic mess of," he made a gurgling sound in his throat, "such a disgusting display of," he stuck a finger down his throat and gagged, turning his head to look disapprovingly at them. His nose scrunched up in distaste, "Affection."

Remus opened his book and sat in amusement, as he knew Sirius continued watching them with such apparent wrath. "Once or twice, possibly."

Another violent sneeze racked his body, and his feet landed with a thud once more on the floor and plush carpet. His head still whirled and he looked around dizzily, eyes slightly glazed as his hands reached out to grab the sofa for support. Sirius looked at him strangely. "You okay there mate?"

"Yeah," he grabbed a tissue. "It's just that, werewolves and allergies," he paused again, and blew into his kerchief, "don't really mix."

"Yeah," Sirius replied, "it's quite unbecoming of you there, mate." Remus found it pointless to recognize outwardly the obvious words he threw back at him, so he ignored it, much to his friend's displeasure.

An odd silence descended, and the fire cackled before the boys, Remus staring at the pages of his book, never turning the page, and Sirius absentmindedly pulled shreds from a throw. Remus felt his fingers itch, with anticipation or something else entirely, they just did. He was watching his friend from the corner of his eyes, as Sirius impatiently waited for something to happen—anything.

Remusslammed his book on the coffee table in front of him, startling Sirius so much he jumped with a short yelp. "That's it."

"That's what?" He shifted uncomfortably on the sofa.

"Out with it, spill; I'm fed up with the obvious secrecy."

"What secret?" Sirius was usually quite good at lying, but not this time, not to Moony.

"Oh come on, you can do better than that, can't you? Peter can lie better than that atrocious piece."

Sirius shot him a glare, "Don't have to be rude about it," he mumbled off to his own, and continued to stare mindlessly throughout the room. "Where is the hopeless bloke anyways?"

"Out with some Hufflepuff," Remus didn't miss a beat.

"Ew, is that the one who tries too hard in Herbology? The one who told you in 'conference?' I'm always getting hurt in that class-" He muttered the last bit, and Remus barely heard him.

"No, it is not trying; it is merely called effort, a virtue completely lost on you. Not only that but she has been eyeing Peter for weeks before he plucked up the courage to ask for a day at Hogsemede, and ever since they have been overflowing their faces with disgusting acts of love and all that."

"Where did you get all that from?"

"The _Houstonia_ _rosea_, otherwise known as the 'Love Bite,' lunged at her whenever Peter walked by. Not only that, but it pricked her as well, marking her as _love-stricken. _It's good for her Peter doesn't know his plants; else she would have been horribly embarrassed."

Sirius looked at him strangely, "Why are you in Gryffindor, why not Ravenclaw or something?"

Remus looked at him with defiant eyes, "You and James are the smart ones, why aren't you too there?"

"Point taken," he said with a wolfish grin. Remus's head suddenly felt strangely light, and his friend's smile seemed endearing and together all too bright at the same time.

"Stop smiling like that, you'll make someone turn to stone or something."

"You do know," Sirius had that grin again, "that Medusa only was cursed because she was so beautiful?"

"Oh why don't you find her then and have rotten little snake children, whom my pups will tear to shreds!" His eyes angrily rushed to his book, unknowing of how he provoked such a response from him.

"Really?" Not that damn grin again!

"You surprise me Moony; I usually can't provoke such a ridiculous outburst like that from you."

His face immediately drained itself of anger and attempted a stony façade. Sirius's face turned an odd sort of red, and he sucked his cheeks in, attempting to stifle it but, alas, Sirius immediately burst out laughing.

"You can't fool me Moony! You're far too predicable!"

His face stopped it's moving and molding to his words, as he grew determined to startle him. "Am I now?" Remus now grinned the evil grin.

The rest of his house had seemed to disappear during their min-argument, and he noticed they had drained up to their dormitories. Usually Gryffindors had a night life, but no one was out save Sirius and Remus, while couples were out for a late night snog in the corridors.

"You just can't surprise me, try it." He paused for extra emphasis, his voice straining on the words, his handsome face curled into pleasure, "I dare you." His voice was low and throaty, and Remus didn't know why but he found he liked that voice. Sirius got up and moved next to him on the couch, grinning a cocky grin, crossing his arms over his chest, shirt straining against his torso, the outline of each hard muscle pushing through.

"Alright." He set his face, dropped his hands onto Sirius's shoulders harshly, watching with amusement as his eyes changed into avid surprise. He held him away from his body, which was telling him to do things to his friend that he would never of thought possible in his mind.

He pressed his lips to Sirius's, feeling them being crushed under his, and noting his surprise with the gasp that opened his lips.

Very few thoughts occupied his mind other than, _my, this is strange. _

Remus Lupin never meant to kiss his best friend, he never meant for Padfoot to lose his balance, or fall on his back so that Remus was on top. He never meant for gravity to have his tongue fall into his mouth.

And he certainly never meant for it to be met with an intensity that had a two second delay, with a ferocious zeal that matched his very own anger. His lips licked over the velvety tongue, and swirled around inside of Sirius's mouth. He reveled in the surprise and burst of pleasure it brought his to feel the vibrations of reaction running though his friend, knowing that _he, _Remus Lupin, provoked such a response.

A slight "murrphm" finally snapped him from his reverie, and his eyes shot open and looked at the boy under him, all rumpled black hair and flushed cheeks, swollen lips and laughing eyes.

"You'll get me sick." He pouted, those puffy lips curling and making Remus tingly in his middle again.

"It allergies moron, they're not contagious." He still hovered over the boy and scrunched his nose, arms bracing him on both sides of his head, palms pressing into the sofa. He leaned back, making himself comfortable.

"That's just an excuse to stick your tongue into my mouth again."

"Excuse me!" Remus's face was indignant brimming with denial. "Just so you know," his finger pushed into his chest as he said sternly, his legs straddling his hips, thigh planes perfectly fitting—, "_You _made me fall, and gravity made me kiss you."

_Oh bugger, _he thought. What a horrible choice of words. He looked intensely embarrassed, and it made Sirius jittery, the pink flush in his cheek line, and the nervous twitch on the corner of his mouth, which he wanted attached to _his_ mouth once more.

"Gravity made you kiss me, eh?"

"That's right you prat, gravity."

"A simple law of nature."

"Of course, what else?"

"Exactly, what else, besides my undeniable good looks and charm, radiant smile, and shining raven locks, sexy voice, rugged good looks…"

"Oh shove it."

"Why me, when I can have you can do it?" Such a coy look fit on him so well it wanted to wipe it off with a painful hunger. Remus looked at him with an odd gaze, noting, that this wasn't just a game. He wanted to know if this really was what Sirius wanted. He _needed _to know if Sirius wanted him as badly as, well Remus did.

Remus bent his head close to Sirius's, and his breath hitched. Remus's lips reached his ears, and whispered in a low voice, "Should I? Do _you _want me to do it?"

Sirius's breath was shaky, and he didn't need to answer.

The common room fire dwindled on its last cimber, the fire still bright even though the wood was dying slowly, and would soon run out. But even if the wood ran out, even if it died with a slow agony, it did not matter how long it would take, from either one day or twelve years. The wood would be restored, and the fire would burn again.

An auburn haired boy led the dark-haired boy up the stairs, pushing him with his hands, resting on his hips, the dark boy's head tipped back into the crook of his neck, face twisted in pleasure, and the caramel boy did wonderful things to his midsection, playing with the waistband on his pajama bottoms and massaging his pelvis. He led them to the empty dorm, where they collapsed onto Sirius's bed with a rumpled, teenagedboy's grace.

That night, Remus Lupin taught Sirius Black how to properly, _shove it. _


End file.
